Tuesday, September 22nd, 2009
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5:32 pm - Oh hey there....
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Wow, what's this? A real post? Yahhh!
My life has been extremely busy these days. I work full time as an intern and I'm a full time graduate student. Crazy, I know! But I'm finding that I'm so up to the challenge of time management! I only have so many hours in the day and so many things I need to accomplish. It's quite a whirlwind, really!
I miss the whole lot of you guys. I'm trying to be online a little more often so I can at least catch you guys online. Hit me up on DrHikaru when you have the chance!
The past few months have really been a journey for me. I have learned so much about myself in my internship. For those of you who aren't aware, I'm an intern for Microsoft Licensing. I love it. I hate it. LOL! But I truly feel like I'm "growing." It's amazing really. I haven't felt I've grown anywhere (except my belly and chub chub) in a while. I'm challenged, I'm engaged, I'm perplexed. And for once, I KNOW I don't know it all, but it's okay. Isn't that odd?
I wouldn't say I'm a bad person or that I was a bad person, but I feel like I'm a better person these days. I'm less frustrated. I'm less insecure. I'm really tired. But I feel like I like me. And I'm comfortable being me. And it's okay if you don't like me. And if you don't like me, I don't feel the need to prove to you that I'm likeable. Or that I need to validate that I can be likeable or that you're not likeable. It's scary. Seriously.
I used to think I was really easy to get along with. That I was a great team player. And then I learned the truth, lol. But that's okay. It's okay that I started somewhere and I look back and go, "oh wow. That's really something." It's interesting to see how we are all warped in our own perception and how we believe we are. Or who we are. Or how much of "who" we "are" is defined by others. And how perception of who/what you are versus who/what you think you are.
I know part of it comes from my extremely competitive nature. Or should I say my insecure nature? Talk about over-compensation! And I still do it. It's like I remember when I finally accepted that I was still beautiful although I was heavier than I wanted to be. And when I accepted that I could be beautiful, I felt beautiful. Next thing you know, I *am* beautiful...to me. Now, I feel that I feel "okay." And by okay I mean, okay with myself. Okay that I'm not perfect. I don't need to be perfect. I don't need to change myself to be who I think I should be. I mean, I can change. But I don't have to change the core of me. I don't have to put up a "front." I don't have to try to be what I think you want me to be. I can just be me. =)
Alright, I'm rambling. It's not making too much sense? But I just feel better. Well, today I do. Tomorrow I might be fighting with myself because it's easier to go back down the path I came from than to walk forward. But it's okay to be vulnerable. It's okay to be me. ^____^
Oh and:
Taken on 9/21/09
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(11 comments | comment on this)
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Thursday, September 17th, 2009
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7:34 pm - Asking for your help!
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Hey everyone!
I need your help!!!
I'll be running (yup, running...not very fast but still running) in the Komen Northern Nevada Race for the Cure this October!
I'm asking you to donate to this wonderful cause! Every penny helps, help me race against cancer!!!
*click me to donate*
Spread the word, I'd love to raise the $$$ for a good cause!!!
I know the run benefits breast cancer, but I'm really running for any cancer, especially since I'm risk (deaths in the family from cancer) =/.
I know my buddy ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) tohma2004 won her battle against cancer. ^__^V I wish my aunt and my gran won theirs =(
<3 <3
Fiona Jane
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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Wednesday, July 15th, 2009
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9:32 pm - Oh noes!
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Thanks for the bday wishes! More later. . .
Okay okay, so in my crazy FF mood frenzie I managed to accidentally get tickets to the after party for the FF concert. Which isn't such a bad thing. Really! I'm excited for that! However, what I really wanted was to see the damn concert! Of course after party tickets are non-refundable. I'm okay with that BUT
I WOULD REALLY WANT TO SEE THE CONCERT.
So WHO HAS TICKETS THEY WANT TO SELL?
I know Jonas has x1. But I would like TWO.
Or:
Who would like to purchase the two afterparty tickets at cost from me? (Read: $231 for two tix)
OR!
Swap concert tickets for the after party tickets (WHAT A DEAL, AM I CRAZY)? Each attendee will receive an autographed Distant Worlds CD, plus the opportunity to meet Nobuo Uematsu and Arnie Roth, take photos, and get autographs. Complimentary hors d'oeuvres (fancy food on a stick) will be available for all! (Drinks additional) Because the Crimson Lounge is a bar, this is strictly a 21+ event.
THIS WOULD MAKE MY FREAKING BDAY.
kthxbye
Daniel scored tickets to both. I love my boyfriend
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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12:25 am - Another Year
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It's my birthday.
I found out I have to move out next month because my brother wants to move in with his friends when the lease expires. Even though I've been paying most of the rent and asked if we could renew a shorter lease so I could recover financially. Nope forget that, he wants to bounce. In the process I'm getting screwed over.
Yeah, so sorry I'm not in a festive mood. I'm beyond livid that he's being so inconsiderate when I've done so much for him. I kind of wish I did what my mom said to do in May after he graduated and lost his job. She recommended I kick him out to their home and I vehemently argued for his cause. And instead I'm getting screwed. He finally lands a job and is like well I'm bouncing. Oh and he doesn't think that he owes any money for his part of the rent that I've been covering.
Yeah.....
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(13 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, May 26th, 2009
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5:24 pm - Goals. . .
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*le sigh*
So even though I had a year subscription to my university's gym, the only time I went there was like to swim or for classes I had. I never once lifted because I hated the atmosphere. You know the college one where people never really go for work outs, just to check each other out? Well not all, but I mean most. I HATE SEEING PEOPLE WITH A SHITTON OF MAKEUP FOR A WORKOUT, just for a workout!
So now to stay with my earlier New Year Resolutions and because I'm tired of feeling fat, I joined the Gold's Gym here in Reno. I used to be a member back in Ohio and loved it.
So far so good, I hope I can lose this chub.
But for a better note, I spam with two pictures from the Reno Aces Baseball game I went to last week with the boyfriend:
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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Sunday, May 24th, 2009
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1:28 pm - Insomnia
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I think the real reason why I can't sleep these past few days is because of stress.
Maybe stress that I'm not good enough? Or that I'm just not enough period.
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(comment on this)
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Saturday, May 16th, 2009
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6:24 pm - Groggy and disgruntled
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My little bro and other friends graduated today.
I'll post more later with pictures.
It's just odd, it was that type of event where I was stressed when I shouldn't be. But then again family events can have that effect. I kinda miss having Rudi as a detresser/buffer.
I should go back to my nap because now all I want to do is cry for myself.
Damn tears of pity.
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(comment on this)
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Monday, April 13th, 2009
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3:12 pm - San Francisco Cherry Blossom Festival
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Sooo, who's going? Leave a comment so I kno! I might not have your phone number, booo!
I will be in the bay on Saturday going to Great America! Anyone coming?
And lastly, I'm not planning on cosplaying. . .but but. . .is there a costume someone would like me to bring along? I might be convinced into bringing something if there are requests. Check my ACP if you're not so sure. . .
Love you guys and CAN'T WAIT to see everyone!
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(5 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, April 8th, 2009
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8:22 pm - Attention!!!
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Saturday April 18 (the day before the Cherry Blossom Festival
Who's down for Great America?!
Lemme know cuz I'm going!!!
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, April 1st, 2009
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10:09 pm - And guess what?
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Tuesday, March 10th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Monday, March 9th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Friday, March 6th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Thursday, March 5th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Wednesday, March 4th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Monday, March 2nd, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Saturday, February 28th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Friday, February 27th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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Thursday, February 26th, 2009
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11:55 pm - Today's Twits <3
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4:00 pm - Today's Twits <3
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